As the CEO & Founder of WomanSavers.com Stephany Alexander has made it her mission to make sure women are protected from scoundrel men. However, her mission isn’t all about negativity, she just provides her clients with a real world outlook on some of dating’s more treacherous pitfalls.
Tell us a little but about yourself and how you got into becoming a dating expert.
I became a dating and relationship expert in 2002 when I started a website called WomanSavers.com Free Date Screening Service which helps women make better, safer and more informed dating decisions. After giving countless women dating advice, I began writing articles on relationships, which in turn, led to writing two books and hundreds of media appearances. I’ve been a dating expert ever since.
You focus on infidelity. What is so compelling about this particular concentration?
Everyone knows someone who has been cheated on or has been cheated on themselves. I felt it was important for women to be able to share information with each other in regards to avoiding potential cheaters and also to give them a place to seek advice and connect with other women who have experienced infidelity. Thousands of women visit WomanSavers.com to screen their dates, read articles on infidelity, get support on how to heal from infidelity and even learn how to affair-proof their relationship. My second book, “The Cheat Sheet,” authored also by Rea Frey, gives women the tools needed not only to catch a cheater but goes inside a cheater’s mind to explain the how’s and the why’s of infidelity. It’s available for sale at your local book store or on Amazon.com.
You also help women screen-out potentially poor dates. How do you go about this?
Women can screen-out potentially poor dates by doing a free search through the WomanSavers.com database to see if their suiters have a negative relationship history. There are tens of thousands of men listed and it’s the largest and oldest database of its kind in the world. However, not all posts are negative. Many times married or involved women will post their partners to let the world know they are involved with a great guy who is taken. In addition, men frequently post themselves. However, when a man posts himself it can be quite obvious because they usually go on about how great in bed they are. Women rarely post about a man’s sexual skills but rather about infidelity, lying and abuse.
The focus of your work is helping women. Does this passion come from a personal experience?
Like many women, I survived various forms of abuse as a child and as an adult and decided it was time to stop living with the pain and start doing something to prevent further abuse for others. I created WomanSavers.com after the break up of a bad relationship because I wanted to help my friends and fellow women avoid abusive and painful relationships and I knew there could be a way by sharing information through technology.
When you talk to women about infidelity do you ever worry that they will start seeing every man as a potential cheater?
If a person has a history of being a cheater, I definitely recommend to proceed with caution because people often repeat their patterns. However, for every bad guy, there is also a great guy and this is something that many women tend to forget after they’ve been hurt.
What are three tips all women should know when looking out for a suspected cheater? Any sure-fire tells?
Three tips all women should know when looking out for a suspected cheater are:
1. If a man is never able to take your calls between the hours of 6pm-9pm, he could potentially be involved with someone else because this is the time you spend with a significant other during dinner.
2. If a man doesn’t invite you to his home or introduce you to his friends, it could be because he is already involved and/or living with someone else.
3. If a man always turns off his cell phone when he is with you or leaves the room to make a call, it could be because he’s polite or because there is someone else besides you in his life.
I’m sure you’ve dated since starting your business. What is the reaction of most men when they realize what you do? Any horror stories?
I actually used to not tell my dates what I did for a living because sometimes it would scare them away, at least those who had something to hide. However, I met the man of my dreams on match.com after screening him heavily and he wasn’t scared away when I told him about my work. In fact, he supported and embraced it. That’s how I knew I could trust him.
What are some words of optimism and wisdom you can give women looking for love on the Internet?
For single women who are currently in the dating world, I recommend to always take your time and be super picky when looking for love on the internet. Screen, screen, screen and then screen some more to help weed out the men who are not right for you. If one online dating site doesn’t work for you, try another. Focus on finding someone who shares your interests so you become friends first, and then lovers second. I recommend a background check and a search through theWomanSavers.com Rate-A-Guy Database for all dates. In a world of murderers, thieves, child molesters, cheaters and con-artists, it is important that people protect themselves. We do a credit check before lending money, or inspect our homes and cars before purchasing, why wouldn’t we research the person we could potentially be spending the rest of our lives with?
Anything else you’d like to add?
The mission of WomanSavers.com is to help women worldwide avoid and prevent abusive and painful relationships by making more informed decisions through shared information. Our motto is “research and rate BEFORE you date” to promote safer and smarter dating decisions.